Writer’s Block: Help Is On The Way

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By Corrine Wnek

I have a morning ritual that I follow without fail every Monday through Friday. After the alarm goes off, I make my way to the bathroom, turn on the radio and begin my shower, makeup and hair routine. I am always hoping that new moisturizer or blush I recently purchased, for about the cost of a small mortgage, will actually erase those ten years from my face that the commercial promised would happen. I’m usually disappointed but then I’m a sucker for advertising.

So the other day, right after the news and weather were reported, a commercial came on for a psychic organization that promised “the best readings you ever had”. It was so matter-of-fact, like everybody does this. Do they, I wondered? There was testimony from clients who swore these psychics told them things from the past that they couldn’t possibly know. Men and women both witnessed to the authenticity of these people and they were so convincing that I started to think I was missing out on something.

[smartads]

But I also noticed that the psychics didn’t refer to themselves as ‘psychics’. They called themselves ‘empaths’. This is very new age and sounds more personal, like someone is empathizing with you. They are on your side and you are connected and they understand you. I realized I must be an ‘empath’, too, because this is a personal requirement if one is to be successful in line of work. The only difference is that I don’t predict futures, although I often delve into someone’s past. But psychics, umm, I mean empaths, don’t usually probe. They’re supposed to tell you things, things you already know. And you pay for that. On the other hand, I counsel my students about things they don’t know and it doesn’t cost them anything.

The commercial for these empaths goes on to say that each of the applicants “goes through a thorough background check and is screened to make sure they have true gifts.” I’d love to be that proverbial fly on the wall when one of these sessions is going on. Now while some people might have highly developed intuitive senses, I wondered how you test for that on a consistent basis. If I’m going to fork over close to thirty or more dollars for a ten minute phone call, I want my empath to have all burners going on that day, at that time.

Since my curiosity got the best of me, I decided to check out this web site for myself. I discovered that there are categories of employment for psychics. That’s right. There are specialties in this industry, just like in law or medicine.

For instance, in the bio section of this site, you can read about Maryanne, a ‘customer favorite’. She is a fourth generation ‘accurate psychic’ who specializes in career and work issues as well as destiny and life paths. Her abilities are as a clairvoyant, a channeler and, of course, an empath.

On the other hand, Avery ‘heals past karma to manifest your dreams”. Huh? I thought the sixties were over. His work revolves around deceased loved ones and relationship issues. Avery’s special abilities are as a clairsentient, clairvoyant and, of course, he’s an empath, too. I’m still trying to figure out what a ‘clairsentient’ is.

Then there is Adriana who will help you with deceased pet issues while Nigel will shoot the breeze with you about your past lives. That would explain why I sometimes feel like a fish out of water.

I’m actually pretty open-minded when it comes to the unknown because I know people, otherwise sane people, who swear by their psychic consults. As for me, I’m going to take that thirty-five dollars and buy a new eye crème that will definitely erase any crow’s feet I might have or my money will be returned, no questions asked.

I wonder if an empath ever returned money to a dissatisfied customer.


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